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It's Been a Long Time


A really long time.
Well, looking back I did post in July but honestly it's been a while since I've done anything of substance and why is that?

Well, I can tell you.
There will be some swear words but if you know me and know me well I never shy from a good swear fest.

Life has been a shit show roller coaster.
Honestly.
Full on, Universal Studios grade, shit show roller coaster, for about two years.

It's used up a lot of the stuff that I used to put here.
I loved posting here.
Loved it.
It was the perfect ADHD mind dump.
It was fun.
Then all of the sudden the thought of having to write a post was so overwhelming it was all I could do to justify NOT doing it.

I had and have a lot of those overwhelming moments still. Mostly in the yogurt aisle when it appears that everyone on the planet has learned that Fage 2% plain is really freaking good and there is none left for me...

honestly. I think in 2016 I full on left my cart and exited the store asap.

Multiple times.

Yogurt people.
I baled because of yogurt.

I'm sure D can reach back in his texts find some where I full on texted him from the parking lot of the grocery store saying 'I just can't do it. I can't. I don't even know why I'm here, I'm going home, I'm sorry'

Poor D. He's handled it all like a champ. It's hard to have a crazy wife. It's harder to have a crazy wife in a tailspin crisis.

I haven't been knitting as much.
In fact in 2016 I cancelled my annual knitting retreat trip to Whidbey Island.

I should note that I immediately regretted it as soon as the weekend arrived.

I didn't cancel this year and it was the best thing in the world for me.
It brought a sense of calm, joy, love and peace to my world.

I was in Las Vegas on 10/1/2017
I wasn't at the concert and my experience is a lot different.
I'll talk about it in a different post.
It helps to talk.

Back to the 2017 retreat and getting back on track.

To say I haven't knit much in the past 18 months is an exaggeration.
I haven't knit anything of substance and it didn't give me the same sense of calm and meditation that it once did.

It's coming back.
Slowly.

All this gloom and weirdness.

It's been rough and while it's going to continue to have it's ups and downs over the next few days/months/years I am working to get into a better headspace/lifespace/balancespace

So Starting 11/10/2017 I will do the 30 day blogger challenge.
We'll get to know each other all over again.
It'll be fun.

We'll reconnect.
We'll learn new things about each other
Maybe we'll even be inspired.
The blog may take a new look, a new spin, not so much knitting and more on life and dealing with life, and finding the joy in the darkness.

I have a bright joy in my life and I treasure it more than anything I have in a long time.

So tomorrow will be a reintroduction to me, my world, and whatever flows from my fingertips.
I hope you're ready.
Honestly
We might need seat belts.


xoxo

Carmel

p.s. all the sites I googled on how to get back to your abandoned blog said the first thing you should do is apologize so here it is...

I'm sorry.
I didn't know what else to do.
Balls had to drop and unfortunately you were one of those balls.
My friends were some of those balls.
I have good friends.
Really good friends.

I missed you blog people.

See you tomorrow :)

Comments

Unknown said…
So happy to hear from you again! You've been missed. I figured there was something going on in your life that you weren't ready to share and of course you did what you had to do for yourself. Best wishes for continued progress. I'll look forward to reading your blog.
Terrie said…
Have faith in your journey, everything had to happen exactly as it did to get you where you're going next. Welcome back my friend, this will be so fun��
Mary said…
Welcome back. We all need to hear real truth. We all have a shit show thank you for sharing yours.
Megs said…
Love this!! 🍷 Cheers to you sweetie!! Love you!! I need to restart my blog too.
Lynn said…
Glad to see you're back! Took a couple days vacation and almost missed your post. I'd have to agree....feels like the Universe is serving me a shit show on a silver platter! I will be thinking of you every time I'm in the yogurt isle!

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