To the Horror of Gabby...

Gabby had her annual senior wellness visit at the veterinary clinic on Friday.
She is in great health.
Her blood work apparently is that of a two year old Boxer.

However...
Her urinalysis was diluted right at the critical point where they start to question things...
It's possible that she simply drank a trough of water before we went down (she did) and that's what caused it.
Or it could be something else. Either way they were going to need another sample. All I had to do, this is the funny part of the conversation, all I had to do was get a fresh sample from her...
Come again?
How does one obtain a urine sample from a dog.
The doctor was very helpful with suggestions.
Follow her around and try and catch it on/in a
ziploc baggy
tupperware
coffee cup
soak it up with a paper towel if she goes on cement
paper plate (that was my favorite)

Perplexed with my task ahead and distracted because we had friends over for dinner I replayed the conversation with everyone...
Our friends had the solution.
A soup ladle. Just follow the dog around and when she starts to do her business stick the ladle under her.
Easy as pitting a cherry right?
It would be except for two things
Gabby is a mobile urinator and she's easily distracted.

Monday afternoon arrived and I had pep-talked myself to death about the task awaiting me when I got home.
Get the dog outside, bring my ladle, catch the urine, contain it and deliver to the vet.
Our dogs are nothing if not completely rutted in routine and me following them outside to 'go potty' carrying a ladle is anything but routine. Add to that I was following Gabby with said ladle making her nervous. Mr. Brown was excited about the ladle and jumping around me like a loon.
It was quite the scene.
Finally the hours in the crate (yes I crate our dogs while we are gone, yes I know how some people feel about that, no my dogs don't hate it) caught up with her and business had to be attended to despite the fact that in Gabby's eyes I had clearly lost my mind. She squatted giving me a shady look as I crept up, possibly rushed up, ladle extended trying to catch the precious sample. Her eyes bugged out, her butt swung right, her butt swung left, all the stuff I needed to collect landing anywhere but in my ladle and Gabby half walking, half running, still peeing as far away from me as possible. Meanwhile, Mr. Brown is still enthralled and excited about the fact that there is a ladle in the back yard and continues to jump, run, and bump me trying to get me to play with him with the ladle... Maybe next time buddy. You'll probably pee right in it just because it's different.

I deposited the sample in a Tupperware container and thought I would try again... Maybe I distracted her enough that she didn't get it all out the first time and I'd get another go at it... So there I was walking around the yard again with the ladle, begging Gabby to go pee, Mr. Brown acting like a lunatic, and Gabby keeping me at a 10 foot distance at all times.

Hopefully the teaspoon I managed to catch will be enough... if it's not well, I'm going to leave it to the experts next time...

Happy Tuesday

Comments

Lynn said…
That could be the scene here. Daphne would be so on to me and "freeze" as soon as the ladle appeared (Oh, no...whats that for?)....A Riley on the other hand would to oblige! He will pee on anything!
Karen said…
I am peeing myself laughing, would that be any help???

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